Dating a newly divorced man with kids comes with its own unique set of challenges. If you are recently divorced yourself, or you understand the challenges of a single mother, you may have an appreciation of what they’re going through. Your shared experience might even be the thing that drew you to them. But there are still some unique considerations. So, if you’re dating a divorced man with kids, make sure you read this guide.
How to Make Divorced Dating Work
The first step to dating a divorced dad is to acknowledge that it’s going to be very different from dating a single man who doesn’t have kids and has never been married. After that, there are a few things to keep in mind:
Set Reasonable Expectations
Are you ready for a boyfriend who is struggling through a divorce? Are you willing to support him, help him look after his child (if he has one), and deal with the potential fallout of a divorce? These are important questions to ask, as it won’t be like any other normal relationship.
Check your expectations and try to see things from his perspective. You might want marriage, kids, and all the trimmings, but he could be less willing, at least in the beginning. If it’s a whirlwind romance you’re looking for, and a honeymoon period where you spend all of your free time together, this might not be it!
Don’t Neglect Your Own Needs
It’s not all about them. It might feel like that sometimes. They’re going through a tough time, so you’ll spend a lot of time consoling them and providing emotional support. But you have needs as well. Make sure he’s meeting them, and consider your options if not. You can discuss it with him and let him know your concerns, or you can drop hints, see if he picks up on them, and reconsider your relationship if not.
Try Not to Take Things Personally
There will be times when he doesn’t seem as enthusiastic about the relationship. It happens. Divorces are tough, and when you have all of that going on, it’s normal to be a little distant. But that’s not a reflection on you or your relationship—support him, talk to him, help him through it!
Connect With His Children
Try to connect with his kids. If you have kids of your own, introduce them. If they get along, it will make life easier for you and may settle some of his anxieties. Kids aren’t always receptive when it comes to stepfathers and step siblings, it’s all part of the struggle of being a single mother. But if you tell them how important he is to you and how much you want to make it work, they might be more willing.
Understand His Needs
Commitment isn’t the only thing he might be lacking. Other issues could be weighing down on him in general. But it doesn’t need to be a difficult time—you’re there, and if he’s interested, he’ll see you as the light at the end of the tunnel. Try to understand what he’s going through and be there to cheer him up when needed.
Start connecting with other single parents.
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The struggle of a single father is similar to the struggle of a similar mother. If you’re in the same position as them, you’ll know what they’re going through and can provide the support and sympathy that they need. That’s why we created Stir. It’s an online dating site tailored exclusively to single parents—men and women looking for friendship, serious relationships, and love with like-minded people.
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Tips and Tricks for Properly Using a Dating Website
The next step to dating a divorced dad is to create your online dating profile and start dating.
- Why Photos Matter: They say you can’t judge a book by its cover, yet that’s what we all do. Your photos might not be 100% of what attracts a match, but they are 100% of their first impressions. Choose photos where you’re smiling and enjoying yourself, as opposed to blank selfie stares in front of the mirror.
- Show Who You Really Are: Don’t be afraid to express your likes. Tell everyone what you love. It might seem boring to the average person, but you’re not trying to attract the average person. You want someone with similar likes who will know what you’re talking about and get excited when they read it.
- Showcase Your Personality Through a Unique Profile: Do you have any anecdotes? Is there something quirky and unique about you? You don’t want a paint-by-numbers profile. You want something unique, so spill the beans and show everyone what makes you special.
- Stay Picky and Patient: Don’t settle for less. You know what you want, and you’ll get it eventually. It might take a week, а month, or even a year—it depends on how picky you are. What matters is that you know what you’re looking for and don’t settle until you find it.
Your Privacy Matters for Stir
As a Stir member, you can choose to hide your profile, making sure that only the people you like can see you. It helps you to ease your way into the world of online dating. It also means you don’t need to worry about encountering exes, friends, acquaintances, and other people who might be using dating sites. Conversely, if you’re ready to put yourself out there, you can increase visibility and get more matches.
Get Started and Find Divorced Dads on Stir!
If you’re looking for a new partner while dealing with the struggles of being a single mom, stick with Stir! It was made for singles like you, and there is no shortage of single dads and recently divorced dads on the platform waiting for your messages.
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