How to Tell if a Man is Serious About You

Men can sometimes be unclear about their feelings and intent. If they’re carrying any emotional baggage from a broken relationship, they may be even less willing to expose their true feelings. Add a potential inability to read signs, something that we all struggle with on occasion, and you may find yourself wondering what’s really going on in his mind.

One of the struggles of being a single mom is finding a man who actually cares and is ready for the next step.

The Ultimate Signs He’s Seriously Into You

Is he serious about me? Is he playing games? Is he hiding his feelings? These questions may be running through your head if you’re trying to work out whether a guy cares. Whether he’s hiding his true feelings or trying to be as blatant as possible, here are some of the signs he’s serious about you:

Sign 1: He Puts in the Effort to Be Exclusive

If you’re infatuated with someone, you only want to be with that person. If you’re in love, you, most likely, can’t imagine being with anyone else. So, if he has suspended his dating profile and is clearly no longer looking for someone else, it suggests he wants to get serious. He could be looking for commitment, an exclusive relationship that can develop into something much more serious.

This is one of the very early signs he’s serious about you—it can start with exclusivity.

Sign 2: He Includes You in His Future Plans

It’s not always a good sign if he talks about your future together and wants to plan living together, getting married, and having kids. It’s one of the most obvious signs, one that most women look for, so some men use that to their advantage. It can be used as a manipulation tactic, and it’s one of the many common obstacles that single mothers face. But if he’s making those plans earnestly, and he’s doing it while respecting you, trusting you, opening up to you, prioritizing you, and trying to make you a bigger part of his life, it’s an excellent sign.

Sign 3: He Trusts You

He should trust you in everything that you do, whether that means meeting male friends for drinks, going away on a business trip, or spending a week on a resort vacation with friends.

A little jealousy is normal, but he should trust that you will always do the right thing, whether you’re on a business trip with colleagues or going on a night out with friends.

Sign 4: You’re a Priority in His Life

He has time off from work and the weekend is quickly approaching. His friends ask him out for a few beers and a game of pool; you invite him over for a romantic night in front of the TV or a date at a local restaurant. Which option does he choose?

If he always chooses his friends over you, he might not be serious about you. He should want to spend all of his free time with you and put you first. Look for the signs he’s making an effort to see you over his friends. That doesn’t mean he should ignore his friends, and it definitely doesn’t mean that you should be his priority from the very first date or kiss. But if he’s genuinely serious about you and wants to take things further, you’ll move to the top of his priority list.

Sign 5: He Introduces You to His Inner Circle

Men generally only introduce a man/woman to their parents, siblings, and close friends if they are anticipating something long-term. They might not want to field the endless questions that can follow the end of a relationship (“Where’s that ex of yours?”, “What happened with you two?”), so if they’re expecting a short, casual fling, they’ll keep you to themselves.

There are exceptions, though. If they live with their parents or share a house with a close friend, you will probably meet them regardless. It’s more convenient. Conversely, if they’re not very close to their parents and don’t have a large friendship group, you probably won’t be encouraged to meet anyone.

Sign 6: He Pushes You to Achieve Your Goals

If he’s serious about you and sees something long-term, he will want you to be happy. He’ll want the best for you, and that means helping you achieve your goals. It can come in the form of verbal support and encouragement or something more direct and involved, such as helping you to study, driving you to classes, and generally going out of his way to help.

Sign 7: He Values Your Opinions

He might not agree with all of your opinions, but he should respect them. We’re all entitled to our opinions, and while you expect an acquaintance to counter them and even argue against them, you deserve more respect from your partner. They might be opinionated and argumentative, and that’s fine, as long as they counter with valid points expressed in a respectful way. However, he should value the opinions you share with him and not disregard you when you express them.

Sign 8: He Always Wants to Be Close to You

It’s natural to want to spend more time with someone you care about, but it’s also normal for that need to exist because the sex is great, and they have nowhere else to be. If you’re just a hookup, with fleeting visits revolving entirely around sex, they’re probably not serious about you (although it could develop into that). If they just want to spend more time with you, whether you’re strolling around the shops, going for a walk on the beach, or just relaxing at home in front of the TV, they could be serious about you.

Sign 9: He is Always On Your Side

Arguments and disagreements are common in all relationships, even healthy long-term couplings where there is a great deal of mutual respect and love. But disagreeing with you in a one-to-one discussion is very different from taking a friend’s or family member’s side and ganging up on you. They don’t have to agree with you, and it’s okay for them to express their issues later, but at that time, they should be on your side. They should support you.

Sign 10: He Opens Up to You

Opening up can be a good sign, but it doesn’t always indicate that they are prepared for something more serious. If they’re a friend, it could just be a sign that they feel comfortable with you. They confide in you because they trust you. They make an effort to open up.

Sign 11: He Doesn’t Mind it When You Use Labels

Does he get uncomfortable when you call him your boyfriend? Does he still introduce you as a “friend” or a “date”? Has he changed his relationship status on social media? Labels are a fantastic way of understanding a man’s true feelings. They won’t use them if they’re expecting a short and casual fling—you don’t mean that much to them, so they won’t tie themselves down. If, however, they are serious about the relationship and want to take things further, they will be prepared to shout their feelings from the rooftops.

They are serious about you. They are proud of you. And they don’t care who knows it.

Sign 12: It Feels Right

One of the most important signs is that the relationship feels right. You don’t have any concerns about his attitude, character, or the way he treats you. He looks for consent every time you engage, and you’re comfortable in his company. That doesn’t just mean that he tells you he loves you on occasion and you have great sex—a serious relationship is much more than that, and if you stay true to yourself and don’t let your heart rule your head, you’ll start to understand how he truly feels about you.

Summary: How to Be Sure He’s Serious About You

All of the above signs suggest that the guy in your life is ready for the next step. If that’s the case, and you’re also ready, it could be time for a chat. You can’t get by on signs and vagueness, as a lot will remain unsaid. Be open with him. Let him know how you feel and where you want the relationship to go.

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